Interview: Tayanna Nelson, Boudoir Photographer & Educator
We like to take time to highlight women we see out in the world doing their part to make the world a little nicer. In this Real Nice Lady Spotlight, we’re talking to Tayanna Nelson (she/they), Boudoir Photographer & Educator, about her mission to make boudoir photography a more inclusive space for all.
Job Title/Profession
Boudoir Photographer & Educator
Favorite Drink?
Alcoholic? Aloha Screwdriver Soda? Sunkist (Who loves orange soda? I do I do I do-ooo)
Favorite Food?
Rib-eye Steaks!
Karaoke Song?
I won't say I'm in Love from Hercules
What song are you listening to on repeat right now?
Have Mercy by Chloe
Female icon you would be for Halloween?
Lizzo
Telling as little or as much as you want, how are you feeling these days?
Stressed! I have a lot of education opportunities coming up, I'm trying to make some changes in my business, and my favorite human being (my grandma) is going through some health stuff lately.
When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?
A teacher! I had to go to "nana school" in the summer because my grandparents were both teachers and I did schoolwork at desks in the basement with workbooks. I was and am a total nerd.
Favorite things to nerd out about?
I can talk to people for hours about Batman if they let me. A childhood internet friend introduced me to the comics and now I have strong opinions about the best Batgirl and the best Robin.
I also did IT for a long time in the hospital world and before that, at Apple so I love learning new software and troubleshooting issues no one else can figure out.
Based on what you wanted to be as a kid, do you see any of those original goals/dreams reflected in your career now?
Absolutely. I am starting to take on more students to teach about boudoir and how to lead a mission-based business. A lot of people are scared to put their entire selves into their business and that's why they burn out. You've gotta be authentic.
Why do you think people (especially business owners) are so scared to be authentic?
I think people are too afraid of not being for everyone. They think taking a stand or supporting who and what they want will lose them business. Which is wild to me.
What first attracted you to your current profession?
Someone just asked me if I'd be interested and that was during a weird place with my body so I was like "fine" and tried it out. Seeing how they reacted to seeing themselves? It was magical and I wanted to replicate that experience. It ended up healing me as well as those clients.
Why did you choose the name Good Bodies?
I was trying to figure out what made me different than other photographers in the industry. Then I thought about the phrase “all bodies are good bodies” and it just clicked in my brain. All bodies really are good bodies and I think more people should know that.
How has your approach to boudoir changed since you started?
When I first started, I tried to be like everyone else because I thought that’s what I needed to do to survive. I bought education from every photographer out there and focused on getting conventionally attractive folks to advertise for me. Now, I focus way more on my client’s individual needs and am constantly taking in their feedback to transform my business into one that works for my clients *and* serves me spiritually.
What is your favorite thing about your industry? Your least favorite?
I love how creative folks can be. I see ways that people are embracing rolls and curves and folds that make me envious. I don't like it when folks get into it for the wrong reason. Money can't be the only motivator when self-worth is wrapped up in what you do.
What do you want for the future of your industry?
I would love to see more folks investing in mission-based boudoir. I wish no one had to feel like they wouldn't feel comfortable being photographed by a particular photographer even when they love their style.
You’ve mentioned mission-based business a couple of times now, what exactly is that? How have you made your business a mission-based business?
A mission-based business has a mission (in this case, body neutrality and fat liberation) that supports its business and pushes it forward. I have done what I can to help remove the stigma of the word fat from my business and actively provide information and resources to my clients to let them know that they are worthy of love and respect regardless of anything else. We are also one of the only boudoir businesses in KC that photographs any and all genders. Fat liberation isn’t just for cis women.
Let’s talk about what you have coming up for your business this year - what are you excited about? What can we do to help or support your goals?
This year we have started to donate money towards KC-based mutual aid in order to pour consistently back into the community where we live. We will be doing our second ever Good Bodies Pool Party in conjunction with Fat Camp which I’m running with Corissa Enneking from Fat Girl Flow.
Just keep telling your friends about us! If anyone wants to donate directly to mutual aid funds, we also wouldn’t hate it! You can check the highlights on our Instagram for money gone towards folks already this year.
What advice would you give other women trying to succeed in your industry?
Put your whole pussy into it! (If I can't say that, please replace pussy with heart) I think that hiding yourself from people who want to hire you is the most damaging thing you can do to your business. When your industry deals with vulnerability, you need folks to put their trust in you.
How has your relationship with vulnerability changed since starting this business?
It has gotten more vulnerable around here while also getting less vulnerable if that makes sense. When you start to have almost 12,000 followers on a social media platform, things change. More people feel entitled to your time and effort and you get a lot of criticism from all sides. I love sharing my story with people, but I’ve also had to learn how to ignore critics and that includes my own inner dialogue.
What advice would you give your 18-year-old self?
Oh god, I'd tell her to drop out of college IMMEDIATELY (or at least after she found her people who are still her BFFs to this day). My major was slowly being whittled down to nothing and I spend every day mad I paid $30K for a half-assed education from men who didn't care.
What was a formative moment in your life that made you who you are?
College truly changed me for the better even if the classes were bullshit. My world effectively expanded my thoughts about my body, about taking care of myself. I took essentially four years to have my "hoe phase" and now I think it helped me know exactly what I want now. This kinda contradicts what I said about dropping out of college, but I didn't pay $30K just to find myself!!
When do you feel the strongest in your life? When do you feel the most vulnerable in your life?
I feel the strongest when I am helping folks build their own businesses. It makes me feel like the money and time I've invested in becoming better was worth something. It grows even more when I get a message thanking me for strategies that worked. I am extremely vulnerable when it comes to trying something new! I don't expect to already be great at everything I do, but I do not love feeling uneducated.
What do you do to maintain your mental health?
I read a lot! I also take time to play video games that spark joy and I've learned (a little bit more) how to actively utilize my work hours. If I do something outside of work, it's because I enjoy it. Not because I feel obligated.
Who are five women that inspire you?
My grandma
My mom
Maya Angelou
Lizzo
Maxine Waters
Regina King
Honorable Mentions: Ava DuVernay, Laverne Cox, and Viola Davis
Sorry, I just really love women
Let’s talk more about women then! Why are these inspirational women so inspirational to you?
All of these women did something amazing that I have so much respect for. They weren’t given a seat at the table so they made their own dining room and that’s amazing. My grandma taught in public schools for 40+ years and is the reason I can use a computer, the reason I was able to read when I was three years old, and is the reason I learned not to settle with my partners. My mom taught me the platform I use to guide my decisions today. The three Fs. If they’re not fucking you, feeding you, or financing you then pay them no mind. I learned a lot about my “take no shit” attitude from her.
Plans for the summer?
We are having Fat Camp for the first time ever! We rented a place in Topeka with a bunch of cabins. We’ll have a chef come to cook for us, we’ll tell campfire stories and best of all is that we’ll have A/C while we do it. We’re trying to re-invent the Fat Camps that traumatized our parents and instead, give people a place to be who and what they are. Think Shrill’s pool party but with a higher community aspect to it. We sold out in just a matter of hours, so if you’re interested in coming in 2023, keep your eyes peeled!